Memang benci kau

Kau ingat kau superstar ke?? Kau ingat kau boleh ambil hati saya??
Sick of this bullshit already.
Benci lelaki ni ish!!
Menyusahkan!!
Menyempah!!!


Why bother anymore? I hate this "game".

1 week to go...

Well dang. There's one week left till I go to the After Party volunteering thing. Am I excited? Sure yeah. Huh this sucks. I don't know what to talk about. Let's see. I'll put it in numbered points:
1. Started playing 21 questions with Gstar (It's amazing how you get to know someone by asking such simple questions)
2. Started taking care of myself "better"
3. I haven't spoken to Aniki in a while. Just received his message, how joyful!! YAY! I miss him oh soo much!!
4. There's 2 weeks left till my group event. Aaarrrgghhhhhhh!!
5. I don't want to wear shitty girly clothes to the after party restaurant thing. But I need to try something new don't I?

It's been 3 years since I last saw you...

She was a delicate fragile person. 
She looked after me when I was a baby and when my mum worked.
She used to tell scary doll story to my cousins and I. 
She had the most sweetest smile.


*cries*


I miss you Arwah Atok (Grandmother).
I knew there was something wrong when we had the Raya webcam chat.
You looked sad. 
Why did you have to leave us so soon?
That time, I had 2 months left before I could visit you.
But you left us too soon.
I really do love you dearly.
I wished you were treated with respect and looked after like a Queen.
You deserved the BEST.


*can't control the stream of tears*


I hope you're happy there.
No pain.
Just pure Laughters and Joyfulness.

RAGE

Welcome back to the Last Term of College.

Everything is going downfall.

My group will have to pick up all the broken pieces and work harder than before.

Stress Stress Stress.

Complications Complications Complications.

3 more weeks till DOOMSDAY! 

7 more weeks till FREEDOM!

41 days till the last year of my Angst TEENAGE YEARS.

You piss me off too.

With your mixed signals.

What are you trying to tell me?

Enough of this childish games.

MAN the FUDGE UP!

I hate you for making me over-think for 3 hours straight. (I might add this again in another post)

I'm sick of the world now.

I hate the way I am.

This shitty word "VULNERABLE".

WEAK

Why am I such a weakling?
I promised myself to go on Hiatus and what did I do?
I cracked!
I had to reply, why? Because I had to.
I felt it would be rude to not reply.
Did I really?
I thought I needed a breather. Well okay, 2 days was enough.
But I challenged myself last time and exceed to 4 days.
Why couldn't I do it this time?
Maybe I should not have watched "10 things I hate about you" at a time like this.
I'm such a loser. 
Is Karma getting back at me?
*sigh*

HIATUS

Finally I've decided to go on HIATUS.
This is a DEFINITE decision.
There's no going back now.
I realised that there are many things that I've yet to accomplish, and not to solely have this social forum site rule my life.
As well as to NOT have this GUY to constantly pop into my head.
I'm sorry Gstar, but I really do need to get back on track.
This addiction? of wanting to talk to you is getting old.
I found it funny that you were on the forum yesterday so many times (6x), were you waiting for me to reply back? 
It doesn't seem like you.
Why do you have to be so freaking cute??!!
Mind you, I still like you.
The little beauty arrived, never realised it was really small.
Right now, I just need a breather.

I bid you a good week my bright shiny STAR. Till we speak again~

INFATUATION

This word got me thinking.
It is "Love of Emotion".
By golly, I just found out what I needed to know.
But then again, I reckon this infatuation somehow triggered towards LOVE.
Hmm, I'm not too sure.
Another thing on my mind: "Love at first sight".
I still don't know what's the explanation for that.
I have a slight idea, but what exactly is it?
Whatever the reason are for my so-called FEELINGS.
I'll just laugh at it.

Leave me alone for a sec.

Sometimes I just wish that life wasn't as hard as it is now.
Everyday is like a new challenge. 

Sometimes I just don't want to be bombarded with other complications and situations.

It makes me reflect my own life and just fudging make me DEPRESS!

I'm going to take it easy.
Singing and listening to music is actually a good way of making me calm.
No stress. No stress.
I can't be bothered with replying now.
I'll take my time when I feel like it. 

Note #10

Slipped at the bath tub,
Hit my knee.
Pain oh pain.
This was 2 hours ago.

Note #9

Scratched arm.

Broken-heart songs.

Late night crying.

Memory flooded in.
Regrets over regrets.

Hmmph, just another day/night for a girl.